An Irreconcilable Difference?

June 8, 2016.Reading time 5 minutes.

We’ve had a good run. I have always been amazed that two people who are so different can make a marriage work. We don’t have very many interests or hobbies in common. She doesn’t like sports and I don’t like her choice in movies – but those are little things. We’ve raised fine children and built a house together, agreeing on the big things.

Our parenting styles are very compatible. Religion, politics, financial goals – those life influences that can divide a couple… we’ve always been on the same page. Oh sure, we’ve had arguments. I don’t recall many knockdown dragouts, but we have fought. In the end, we have made up. We both believe in the Biblical admonishment to never let the sun go down on your anger so we have always tried to solve our issues before we go to bed. It has worked for over two decades. We suffered through seemingly unendurable pain of late. But we did it together.

Now, however, something is changed. Read More

Cancer for Christmas

December 21, 2014.Reading time 9 minutes.

My wife sat at her laptop furiously compiling the lists for our four girls. She checked it once, then again while travelling to website after website scouring the internet for the best price and delivery. Items were added to baskets and carts checked out at such a frantic pace that I literally felt a warmth emanate from the credit card in my back pocket. Shopping at a fever pitch – Christmas delivered in two days or less. Not like most years, where she disappears for hours on end to find the perfect gift at the mall. She doesn’t have time for that this year because we got cancer for Christmas.

We didn’t ask for it. It wasn’t circled in the wishbook or written in red crayon. No one sat on Santa’s lap and begged for it. No, cancer just showed up unannounced and took our year away.

So rather than spending quality time with each of the girls to weigh their enormous wants against our limited budget as in years past, she spent Saturday morning hunting and pecking under great duress. Do they have the right size? Will it be delivered on time? Is that really something she will use or should we just give her cash?

At some point during the madness, I asked her what she wanted for Christmas. She paused to consider. Her eyes got red and her mouth failed her. She didn’t answer, but I knew. I knew what she wanted the second I asked the question and Amazon.com can’t deliver it, even though we are Prime members. It is the only thing either of us want.