Author: Mark Myers

I am a husband of one, father of four daughters, a dreamer, a builder, a believer, and most enjoyably a writer. In 2015, I became a reluctant Childhood Cancer Advocate as we lost our youngest daughter Kylie to the disease. Kylie taught me to steal joy from even the worst of circumstances and I will always be on the lookout for happiness among the thorns of life. Join me for a generous helping of laughter and tears.

The Coffee Thief

.Reading time 4 minutes.

Many years ago, I began getting my fat butt out of bed at 5 am to try to reduce the size of said fat butt. Sometimes those resolutions fade by February, but this one stuck. I lost weight, got fit, and even ran a few marathons. I also learned that you don’t consistently get up at 5 am without coffee.

Coffee is the sweet nectar of a contented life.

Soon a creative stirring began and I wanted to write. But my evenings with four young children consisted of eating, playing, and reading Paddington before collapsing into a crumpled heap. Sometimes I even made it to my own bed. A sacrifice was necessary, so I made a decision to go from six gym days to four and give myself two mornings a week to write. I wrote and blogged and blogged and wrote in the early dark.

I also consume copious amounts of rich, dark coffee in the quiet of the morning.

This pattern has continued… but lately, someone has been stealing my coffee. Ordinarily, I would protest like a grumpy old man should. I would fling my arms in the air and huff around. Or maybe I’d play the martyr card with a loud hurumph. After all, it’s MY coffee.

But I somewhat like this intrusion.

The only one of my children who ever got up early was Kylie. She liked coffee but was far from a purist, however. She tainted it with so much sugar and cream that it became something more akin to the fountain at Willie Wonka’s factory than the smooth, bitter goodness I enjoy. I didn’t mind. Rather than break the silence of the dark, Kylie had a way of adding to it as she snuggled beside me sharing a wordless kind of love.

There is nothing quiet about the new coffee thief. Her alarm starts around 5:45 am and repeats at regular intervals until the tune drones in my head hours after the sun has risen. Curse that wretched snooze button! At 6:15 the thief will trudge through the dark and unashamedly pour a cuppa from MY carafe – reducing the sum total of my bliss and likely lowing my blood pressure by a point or two…

IMG_0530But then I remember, this is what we’ve worked, hoped, and prayed for. This coffee thief is getting up as she begins her life of gainful employment. And it is fun to behold. In fact, it is a full circle moment.

Ms. Myers is now the 7th grade English teacher at the very school she attended. The school all my girls went to – the place we loved and loved us so well during Kylie’s sickness and death. This was actually her dream job and getting it was a complete God wink.

She has so much to offer as a teacher and mentor and I can’t imagine a better life than pouring it out for others. Those are lucky kids. Oh, I don’t imagine she’ll be a pushover. She rails me for grammatical missteps and I am sure some of her students will offend her Shakespearean snobbery. But she’s the fair sort and will be a delight.

I guess that’s worth a cup of coffee or two.

 

And just think… in an odd sort of way, I am influencing the youth of today by proxy. Now that’s something to consider and fear!

Licking the Pavement

.Reading time 5 minutes.

A few weeks ago, I watched my brother-in-law’s dogs while they spent a week at the beach. They’ve got two dogs: Maggie and Loopy (*name changed to protect the crazy). Maggie is a middle-aged chocolate lab. If you’ve ever owned a lab, you know that middle-aged can still mean terrible twos. Labs often live a decade as a puppy then become senior citizens overnight. I guess that’s what makes them so lovable.

Maggie is the exception. She has always been calm and sweet. She’s just laid back by nature. They found out recently that she is diabetic and I had to give her a shot of insulin in the mornings. This proved rather tricky – only because I didn’t listen very well when instructions were given.

This is a recurring theme in my life. I like to think of it as a cute little quirk, but it is often frustrating when I am left to do a task with no remembrance of how to do it… and from the inside looking out, I imagine this “quirk” is mind-numbingly bothersome to my family. When I take time to consider this, I often think I should change my ways and do better. But then I forget what I was thinking and move on to more fruitful imaginings. After all, we deserve a few eccentricities when we pass 50.

Back to the dogs…

Maggie and I weren’t working well together. For the first few mornings, she wasn’t very thrilled to see me coming with the shot and even though she is mellow, she does weigh 100 pounds and is tall enough that her bucks can reach sensitive areas. But then I discovered wet dog food. Wet dog food smells like a moldy, damp cellar after a possum has crawled in and died on a hot day. But to a dog, it must be like a chocolate éclair. She woofed it down and didn’t even notice the prick of the needle on her neck. Perfect. And this became our routine (and was evidently the instructions provided had I listened.)

But where is Loopy?

When set free in the morning, Loopy bolted straight to a puddle left by rain run-off from the car. I found her licking the pavement. In a panic, I checked to see if I had neglected to leave the water. Nope, three full bowls of nice, clean h2o – and yet that dog preferred to lick the pavement. Every morning it was the same thing. I tried coaxing her with bottled water, treats, and a ball to play with. No dice, she ran straight for the puddle. With plenty of better options, she only wanted to lick dirty water from the pavement.

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One day during the week, my lovely wife had a birthday. Although you wouldn’t believe it to see her, she has joined me in the half-a-century club. We took her to a fun, loud, Italian dinner. A few tables away, there was a family of four who quietly interacted with their phones during the whole meal. I kept stealing glances and at some point, it dawned on me… they’re licking the pavement. With better options all around, they are glued to little electronic devices.

I could moralize more, but I’m as guilty as the next guy. Whether it is Instagram, football, our careers, or any myriad of other distractions, we get stuck wasting time on temporal things instead of investing in things that matter – our family, friends, and other human relationships. We lick the pavement.  Some things are unavoidable. We have to work and get things done. But be honest, we’ve all got the rocky, pebbly taste of wasted time on our tongues and time is a finite resource. What’s the answer?

As much as possible, let’s stop licking the pavement lick the important people in our lives instead!

Wait… that doesn’t sound right at all.