A Necessary Retraction

As a blogger who often writes about my family, I try hard not to embarrass anyone or reveal anything too personal. My goals are to inspire, amuse, enlighten, but never offend. It seems in my latest post I have done just that – and not to just anyone. I have offended the most important person in my life and home, my lovely wife.

For that, I am deeply sorry.

I want my blog to be a place of humor and comfort without dwelling on things controversial, political, or confrontational. I’m not that sort. But I am snarky. My mind always has a witty retort trolling around inside. In my younger days they just pushed their way out forcing me to live with the aftermath of the insult. Years have given me greater control and most of the time I can tighten my lips and laugh to myself while I consider whether the barb is worth the consequence. Most of the time…

This isn’t my first misstep nor is it my most egregious babbling of stupidity. I have said worse in our nearly 24 years of marriage. I won’t quote the top ten to prove it, but it still saddens me that I crossed the line this time.

Here it is:

It seems that when I detailed my antics of buying clothes on the cheap, I inferred that she approved of these shoes.

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This statement has offended her sensibilities and for that I am deeply sorry. These shoes were a completely separate purchase from the outfit I procured for the event and she in no way endorses their wear nor can she look at them without feeling some measure of revolt. Although she understands my eccentricity and has learned to live with it, she does not like these shoes whatsoever and for me to insinuate such a thing (however innocently) offended her greatly. I am sorry.

Here are the pieces of clothing she endorsed. I must add that they are endorsed independent of each other – not as an ensemble.

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I am sorry for any grief, pain, and suffering this misstatement has caused to her reputation and fashion sense. I further agree to be more careful in the future when I infer her approval to my choice of style.

 

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*By the way, this is a joke. While she doesn’t like the shoes and did playfully call me out on the insinuation that she approved of them, she has somehow found a way to love me despite my style-ish ways. For that I am grateful.

 

Another classic apology:

 

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17 thoughts on “A Necessary Retraction

  1. Funny, Mark. Although I must admit, I might approve of the unapproved-of-shoes with the approved-of shorts and top as an all together approved of outfit.

    But then I’m a bit “out there” myself. 😉

  2. I think Robin might be a little bit hilarious by herself in a quieter sort of way. Otherwise, you would not have made it almost 24 years! Love y’all.

  3. I used to wear a bright yellow rain coat until my husband called me the big cheese. He wasn’t wrong to intervene – it was boxy and school bus yellow – but your flower shoes are pretty sweet and definitely go with the blue shirt and gray shorts.

  4. I am rolling!
    A couple who shops together, stays together…er, something like that.
    I have no doubt that your heartfelt apology will somehow find a way to trigger forgiveness.
    Well played, Sir. Well played.

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